Anyone who’s been stuck in the dating scene for a long time will tell you that the hardest part about trying to find a compatible partner is actually meeting them. The rest sort of just falls into place once that step is taken.
Meeting potential partners takes a lot of patience and luck. Both potential partners need to be in the same place, at the same time, and in a receptive and social frame of mind in order for attraction to occur. This can be pretty rare, especially if you’re very aware of the fact that you’re trying to meet someone.
Most of the happy couples that I know met each other through happenstance or through a mutual acquaintance, but these aren’t factors that you can control. However, these people all met each other after making a pronounced effort to actively locate their Mr. or Ms. Real. Here are seven tips that you should follow in order to increase your chances of meeting them.
1. Constantly Expand your Social Network
Try to meet new people and interact with them at every possible opportunity. Don’t become complacent with your current circle of friends unless it offers you endless opportunities for dating. Even if you feel very socially accomplished and have a large group of friends, don’t hesitate to set out and make new ones, as you never know what kind of people THEY know that could provide interesting romantic options.
Hang out with your co-workers outside of work. Don’t be afraid to talk to people that you encounter during your daily routine, even if you aren’t directly attracted to them or can’t imagine the benefit of befriending them. Talk to everyone, as you never know what kind of unexpected opportunities that they may present.
2. Meet All of your Friends’ Friends
The most common way to meet a compatible partner is through mutual friends. Your current friends may know people that you’ve never met that know people that could be right for you, so don’t hesitate to chase down any possible leads. Ask to be invited to events that your friends attend that you usually aren’t included in.
Meeting someone through a mutual friend is so effective because it has a few tangible advantages over meeting a complete stranger. First of all, it’s assumed that you have something in common because you both have respect for the same person or group of people (your mutual friends.) If your friend finds something to like in these people, and you find something to like in your friends, then chances are that you will like something about their friends.
Secondly, the mutual friend takes a lot of pressure off of the situation. When you’re face to face with someone you’ve never met, there are many factors that come into play that may make either party nervous or unsure. When you’re meeting someone who shares a mutual friend, you can display your value and your personality simply by talking to your friend (who you’re comfortable with) in their presence.
Finally, if you find that you’re attracted to one of your friend’s friends, they can act as a facilitator and plant ideas of romance and potential relationships inside their heads. Most people depend on the recommendation of people they trust when they’re uncertain about something, and this will automatically give you an edge.
Don’t be ashamed to ask any of the members of your inner circle if they have single friends that you may be compatible with. People love playing matchmaker.
3. Go Where You Belong
You should have a pretty decent idea of what type of men are right for you at this point. Make sure that you go to places where these men hang out.
For example, if you’re in to intelligent men, you should probably try to locate a place in your community where these men gather. If you’re in to sensitive men, then going to bars and clubs is probably not a good idea if you’re looking for partners.
On the other hand, if you’ve dated low-key, domestic people for your entire life and are looking for excitement, then maybe it’s a good idea to get out of your shell and put yourself in places where confident, adventurous men like to hang out (the bars and clubs might be a good idea.)
The idea is that people always hang out with like-minded people. In order to meet the person that you want, you need to find where people like them hang out and adjust your schedule accordingly. If you’re tired of bar boys but you keep hanging out at the same dives, then you have only yourself to blame.
4. Be Aggressive
Even if you put yourself in the right places, you won’t automatically be guaranteed that someone will approach you. Try to talk to as many people as you can, as you never know who may appeal to you after a little bit of conversation.
Being aggressive and opening conversations makes the men you’re talking to more likely to open up and relax. You don’t need to sound flirty or suggestive, but you should try to appear friendly, open, and social.
Many women I know found men that they had known for many years but rarely ever talked to. When they finally did, they realized that they had no idea who these people were for all of that time, which brought to light attractive traits that weren’t immediately obvious.
If you’re the shy type and this makes you uncomfortable, then you’ll need to break that habit. Shyness and social phobias are demons that can be beaten with practice and courage, so try to go out of your way to talk to people that you normally aren’t comfortable with. You’ll get used to it, and the fear will dissipate over time.
5. Stay Active
The absolute worst thing you can do is stay home and feel sorry for yourself. Constantly make plans that put you in social places, even if you don’t feel motivated. Join community organizations or service organizations that align with your interest. Make a movie night with your best friends and their best friends. Do something.
Inactivity is a total waste of time. You’ll start to feel lonely or sorry for yourself, which is completely counter-productive. Even if you’ve been searching for a long time, you shouldn’t be discouraged. If you give up, then you’re destroying your chances to meet someone who could be right for you.
Avoid forming activity patterns that leave you alone for extended periods of time. Loneliness can make even the most confident person depressed.
6. Stay Positive
Your attitude and outlook can have just as big of an impact on your results as your strategy and approach. If you’re very negative and you become discouraged, you’re less likely to find the motivation to get out there and do what needs to be done. If you do meet someone, your mood may color them as unattractive or unavailable when in fact they may be a very good match for you. In addition, nobody likes negative people. They want to surround themselves with positive influences. You may come off as grumpy or unattractive to someone who may normally be very attracted to you.
On the other hand, if you’re optimistic and positive, then you’re less likely to suffer setbacks. Minor failures won’t seem as epic or as world-shaking, and you’ll be able to find the energy to pursue the approach that works for you. Positive people are inertly attractive, and you’ll find that more people look to you for guidance and acceptance if you have a sunny disposition. It adds to your value.
Even if the going has been tough, negative attitudes will only serve to worsen your situation. Keep your head up.
7. Have Fun
Many people look unhappily at their single days, wishing they had a partner. The truth is that being single and meeting new people is fun and exciting with the right outlook. You’re young, and there’s no pressure to rush into a serious relationship at this point in your life. Enjoy the freedom, and have fun! That way, the time between now and finding Mr. Real will seem like a breeze.
For more information and more on how to find YOUR Mr Right check out
http://www.themrrightmyth.com